


Team MITHology

by Heathstar, IreneMel



Series: Team MITH [2]
Category: RWBY
Genre: F/F, Four bros; chillin in a group chat; in the same bed cause they’re all gay, Shenagins, not_for_Children
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:53:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25769227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heathstar/pseuds/Heathstar, https://archiveofourown.org/users/IreneMel/pseuds/IreneMel
Summary: A bullshit chatfic made by me and my friend
Relationships: Original Character/Original Character
Series: Team MITH [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1869400
Kudos: 1





	Team MITHology

Energizer Bunny = Irene  
A_Bunny's_Wingman = Hearth  
Lady_Ass = Monica  
Theorn = Theorn

3:00 AM

Energizer Bunny: Well, This should be fun.

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: Sup peasants?

Lady_Ass: Which one of you fuckwads changed my name

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: The Admin.

Lady_Ass: Do you have the slightest idea how little that narrows it down?

A_Bunny’s_Wingman has changed Energizer Bunny’s name to Boss_ASS_bitch

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: Narrowed it down yet?

Lady_Ass: I think I have.

Boss_ASS_bitch: I am surprisingly okay with this.

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: Says the person who constantly gets sat on by the team leader.

Boss_ASS_bitch: Yes.

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: She’s sitting on your lap right now isn’t she?

Boss_ASS_bitch: Yes.

Lady_Ass: She learned how Gravity Dust works.

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: Glad I gave her Gravity Dust then.

Lady_Ass: That’s not why I’m sitting here, I’m just letting you know. Hijinks and shenanigans may ensue.

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: Monica.  
A_Bunny’s_Wingman: If you had the chance, you wouldn’t be sitting on Irene’s lap.  
A_Bunny’s_Wingman: Do not try to deny it, I know you.

Lady_Ass: Do y- oh right you do

Theorn: It. Is. 3AM!

Boss_ASS_bitch has changed Theorn’s name to Puppy_Power  
A_Bunny’s_Wingman has dropped Boss_ASS_bitch from the rank of Admin

Boss_ASS_bitch: You know what? That’s entirely fair.  
Boss_ASS_bitch: Still hate you though.

A_Bunny’s_Wingman has changed Boss_ASS_bitch’s name to Monica’s Seat

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: And the best part is, you can’t change it!

Monica’s Seat: You assume I would want to.

Puppy_Power has changed their name to Wolf (Starfox)

Wolf (Starfox) has left the chat.

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: You know what imma do? I’mma get Irene a bandana that just has her current username on it.

Monica’s Seat: PLEASE DO

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: Only if you promise to wear in around your head.  
A_Bunny’s_Wingman: I said I was going to play wingman. I said NOTHING about being subtle.

Monica’s Seat: And I appreciate that.

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: You now have a new birthday present from me.

Lady_Ass has changed their name to Monica

Monica: I FIGURED IT OUT

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: Figured what out?

Monica: NAME SHE ANIGANS

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: ?

Monica: Also, I could fuck you all over by giving back Irene admin powers  
Monica: But I will not, For I’m a gracious goddess

A_Bunny’s_Wingman: You’re sitting on Irene’s face now aren’t you?

Monica has changed her name to Just_Monica

Just_Monica: I am

A_Bunny’s_Wingman has changed their name to Mission_Complete

Just_Monica has changed Monica’s Seat’s name to Peppy

Mission_Complete: Hey Monica?

Just_Monica: Ye?

Mission_Complete: I’m guessing you're not exactly wearing pants at the moment.

Just_Monica: I can feel the nosebleed on my glutes.

Mission_Complete: So Irene is getting sat on… by you… without pants? Or underwear?

Just_Monica: She’s wearing pants. I’m wearing underpants, but her nose bleeds very large.

Mission_Complete has left the chat

Just_Monica: Get Back here or I’m giving Irene admin back.

Mission_Complete has joined the chat  
Mission_Complete has dropped Just_Monica from the rank of Admin  
Mission Complete has left the chat

Just_Monica: Oh god, Theorn’s my only hope  
Just_Monica: That’s depressing  
Just_Monica: Quiet you.

Peppy: I might fall asleep right here  
Peppy: Please don’t suffocate me

Just_Monica: No promises

6:09 AM  
Wolf (Starfox): Nice  
Wolf (Starfox): Also, rude 

9:59 PM

Mission Complete: Monica truth or dare?

Just_Monica: Dare, fuckwad.

Mission Complete: I dare you… to spend the entirety you are in the chat sitting on Irene’s face.

Peppy: First off, I can see her coming towards me.  
Peppy: Second, can someone change my name?

Just_Monica has changed Peppy’s name to My_Rabbit_Throne

Just_Monica: Be careful what you wish for.

Mission Complete: You sitting?

Just_Monica: Read Irene’s Name.

Mission Complete: My mistake. Are you sitting on your rabbit throne my queen?

Just_Monica has changed her name to Ass_Goddess

Ass_Goddess: I am indeed, mortal.

Mission Complete: Is thou comfortable?

Ass_Goddess: Other than the leak it has sprung.

Mission Complete: Hey Monica. Do you want to double down on the dare? I will pay you ten thousand Lien…

Mission Complete has changed their name to Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: And you know it’s true.

Ass_Goddess has changed their name to GoddAss

GoddAss: Explain.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Raven.

GoddAss: I meant explain how I’d double down.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: I’ll phrase it like this.  
Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Give Irene a view she would never forget. ;)

GoddAss is typing…

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Ohhh. Shit.

GoddAss: Nah. I’m not willing to cause my team member’s death by blood loss.  
GoddAss: Especially If Ozpin Found Out.

Coffee&SugarCane: Bold of you to assume I can’t access this chat.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Bold of you to assume any of us particularly care… Ozma.

Coffee&SugarCane is typing...

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Oh no.

Coffee&SugarCane: You have five seconds to run, mister Branwen. I will be sending Miss L after you.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Neither of you scare me. There is only one person who scares me, and she hates you all.  
Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Also known as my mother. :)

Coffee&SugarCane: Favors can be called in.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: And I can generate a massive column of fire large enough to be seen from space. Your point?

Coffee&SugarCane: Do you mind if I add some people to this chat?

Wolf(Starfox): So you are bringing in reinforcements against these idiots? Please.

Coffee&SugarCane: Actually, another team who doesn’t have their own GC. Have fun.

Coffee&SugarCane has added JauneNotJoan, ForceOfAttraction, and four others to the chat

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird has hidden the chat history

Coffee&SugarCane has unhidden the chat history

Coffee&SugarCane: I have admin over all chats. It’s a headmaster’s benefit.

Lord of Ice: Why the fuck did Ozpin invite me to this shit again? AND WHY IS LING HERE?!

TickTock: This should be fun. Also, kinky.

Lord of Ice: Fair point. I just scrolled up. To Jaune and Ruby if you’re there, don’t.

JauneNotJoan: Why not?  
JauneNotJoan: MISTAKE! MISTAKES WERE MADE!

Coffee&SugarCane: Thank you for the idea.

SugarSpeed, Cold-as-Weiss, And two others have been added to the chat

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird has hidden the chat history and locked it with a password

Coffee&SugarCane has unhidden the chat history

Coffee&SugarCane: You forget that I have cameras in the school. I saw the password as you typed it.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird has hidden the chat history and locked it with a password, leaving the cinnamon roll innocent.

SpeedySugar: What's going on?

GoingOutw/aYang: Trust me. You don’t want to know. However, Nice.

GoddAss: Can I get off Irene’s face now? The blood is soaking into my pants. (Hidden From SpeedySugar)

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Sure, pretty sure she is unconscious now anyway.

GoddAss: THANK YOU

SpeedySugar: What's with the screen name? Because all I see is a blank bunch of underscores.

GoingOutw/aYang: Don’t. Ask.

Cold-as-Weiss: Seriously. Don’t.

PrettyKitty: Do Not dare.

Ren: You should not.

JauneNotJoan: Don’t make the mistake I did.

ForceOfAttraction: I’m having to weigh Nora down to prevent her from encouraging you. Don’t.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Then you have my thanks, warrior of argus.

Coffee&SugarCane has left the chat

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird has changed SpeedySugar’s name to Cookie_Monster

GoddAss has changed My_Rabbit_Throne’s Name to Nosebleed_Central

PANCAKES!: Pyrrha FINALLY got off my back.

Ren: If you unhide the history from Ruby, you won’t get pancakes for the next two months.  
Ren: And there are the strongest puppy eyes she has ever done.

PANCAKES!: Okay, I won’t.

PANCAKES! has unhidden the chat history  
PANCAKES! left the chat

Ren: I have a threat to make good on.  
Ren: Also, Nora? Remember the tickle monster?  
Ren has left the chat

Nosebleed_Central: I'm glad I can avoid that.

JauneNotJoan: I’m glad I get to watch. This is the first time I’ve seen Ren sprint.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Hey Monica want to hear something funny?  
Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: I already transferred the Lien to your account.

GoddAss: Wonderful. Free money.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: But it's locked behind a password only I know.

GoddAss has changed their name to BrokeAssBitch

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: I was going to give you said password, but now I don’t think I will.

BrokeAssBitch: Why not?

Cold-as-Weiss: Why do all of Monica’s names have ‘ass’ in them?

Nosebleed_Central: If you’ve seen it, you’d know.

Wolf(Starfox): I’m gay and I acknowledge the fact that it’s nice.

Cold-as-Weiss: And you are?

Wolf(Starfox): Theorn Pretane? The guy who always stares at Sun’s abs?

GoingOutw/aYang has changed their name to BlondeBastard

BlondeBastard: Oh, that guy!

Wolf(Starfox): Says the person who always stares at Blake’s ass. To the people who forgot, I am a wolf, so I can smell different emotions. Including Lust.

PrettyKitty: …  
PrettyKitty: Yang?

BlondeBastard has left the chat  
PrettyKitty has left the chat

Wolf(Starfox): So, any Bumblebee shippers here?

Ren: Now, Nora owes me an apology and ten Lien.

Cookie_Monster: I NEED EYE BLEACH

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Mom’s gonna kill me. SHIT QROW’S GONNA KILL ME!

BrokeAssBitch has added SilverRex, NoraB and two others to the chat

Dragon’s Dream: Whomst the fuck

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Teams MITH, RWBY and half of JNPR i think. 

Lord of Ice: FYI I’m a god. K bye.

Lord of Ice has left the chat

Dragon’s Dream: Only half?

ForceOfAttraction: The other half is currently having a tickle war.

Cold-as-Weiss: Two of my team are dashing around campus trying to run away from their gayness.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: At least one of my team is having fun. Me, not so much.

BrokeAssBitch: I had to take away Irene’s phone because she was about to start spewing cursed concepts again  
BrokeAssBitch: JESUS THAT’S A HIGH JUMP

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: You taped her phone to the ceiling didn’t you?

Nosebleed_Central: YOU FOOLISH FOOL, I HAVE RATT FHBEISVSOWB

BrokeAssBitch: I got it again

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Would now be a good time to mention I multiplied the amount I transferred to your account by about fifty?

BrokeAssBitch: Irene, get over here

Nosebleed_Central: Hearth. You. RULE!

Coffee&SugarCane: Please remember that I have to pay extra for cleaning whenever you sit on her.

BrokeAssBitch: GOOD

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird has sent one part of the password.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: Every minute I send one more number. The Password is only ten numbers, you’ll probably remain sitting there for longer though.

BrokeAssBitch: Gonna have to change my name soon

TickTock: Kinky in the name of money. Sounds like a cousin of mine.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: What are you going to change your name to?

BrokeAssBitch: Dunno yet.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird has changed BrokeAssBitch’s name to GoddAss_Monica

Cookie_Monster has left the chat

GoddAss_Monica: I don’t blame her.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird has sent number 2 of the password.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird: I keep my word. You comfy Monica?

GoddAss_Monica: Somewhat.

Son_Of_A_Bitchy_Bird has changed their name to Hearthstone

Hearthstone: How is Irene doing under there?

GoddAss_Monica: As good as always.

Hearthstone has sent two numbers of the password.

Hearthstone: I forgot and it’s been two minutes since the last one.

Team JNPR has left the chat  
Team RWBY has left the chat

Hearthstone: I’ll make you a deal Monica. I send you the entire password now, but you still act like you don’t know it. (Private message)

GoddAss_Monica: Deal. (PM)

Hearthstone: The password is passworded. That’s it. (PM)

GoddAss_Monica: Of course it is. (PM)

Hearthstone: Enjoy the seating arrangements. (PM)

Hearthstone has left the chat

4:20 AM

Wolf(Starfox): Nice

4:44 AM

Nosebleed_Central: Cereal eaten after noon is just stoner soup.

Hearthstone: Do you pride yourself on being coherent at ungodly times in the morning or do you do it accidentally.

Nosebleed_Central: Yes

Hearthstone: Fair enough.

GoddAss_Monica: I just heard a Minecraft door sound in my head  
Hearthstone: 

Nosebleed_Central: That’s the sound of your coherence leaving you

GoddAss_Monica: OH FUCK

Hearthstone: I’m just going to go to my small home in my bag. It is soundproofed so I won’t hear any of this shit. Also it has better wifi than Beacon.

Wolf(Starfox): Your bag... has wifi.

Hearthstone: Yes.

Wolf(Starfox): And you were going to share this when?

Hearthstone: Never.

GoddAss_Monica: ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?!

Hearthstone: Yep.

Nosebleed_Central: On a scale of one to ten what would you say your wifi was?

Hearthstone: Ten being the best? Ten.

Nosebleed_Central: MoMo, you have a key, right?

GoddAss_Monica: I do.

Nosebleed_Central: HERE WE COME

Hearthstone: NO THIS IS MY ONE PLACE WHERE I can… You’re here.

Nosebleed_Central: What's the password 

Hearthstone: You’s_a_bitch.

Nosebleed_Central: Thanks!

Hearthstone: Monica’s above you.

GoddAss_Monica: Whoops.

Hearthstone: And once again, you landed on her face. Though this time, she was the one who looked up.

GoddAss_Monica: This is why I have to do laundry more than anyone else in this team.

Hearthstone: You do realize that special combinations of Dust THAT I CAN MAKE can do that for you right? Instantly?

Nosebleed_Central: This is fine.


End file.
